Talking to someone from another country is mostly the same as talking to anyone new: be curious, listen, ask a follow-up. What changes is that the easy assumptions stop working. Their evening might be your morning, a joke might not cross the border, and the things you think you know about their country are usually the least interesting thing to bring up.
On a random video chat this comes up all the time, because the person who picks up can be anywhere. Here is what helps.
What to ask someone from another country
The best questions are about their ordinary life, because that is the part you cannot look up:
- "What does a normal day look like there?" School, work, traffic, when people eat dinner. Small differences are where the good conversations start.
- "What should a visitor eat first?" Almost everyone has an opinion, and the answer usually comes with a story.
- "What is the weather doing right now?" If one of you is south of the equator, you may be in opposite seasons. That alone can carry a minute.
- "What do people there think of where I'm from?" Turns the curiosity both ways, and the answers are often funny.
- "How do you say … in your language?" Hello, thank you, good night. Then try it out loud and let them laugh at your accent.
What tends to fall flat: opening with the country's most famous problem, politics or religion, or a stereotype dressed up as a question ("so do you all…?"). Even when it is meant kindly, it tells the other person you are talking to a headline, not to them.
Talking across a time difference
Ask what time it is for them early on. It explains a lot: someone who sounds quiet may be on a late night, someone rushed may be about to leave for work. If it is very late on their side, keep the first call short and say so — "it's late for you, let's not keep you up" lands well.
If you want to talk again, the time difference matters more than anything else. Work out which hours overlap for both of you before you say goodbye. On Chat Random, following someone keeps them in your following list, so you can message them and call when they are online.
When you don't share a first language
Use short sentences, skip slang and idioms, and type the words that keep getting lost — a typed word survives a bad connection and an accent. In a Chat Random call, messages from the other person can be translated with a tap. There is more on this in chatting with girls in another language.
Cultural differences that trip up a first call
Most awkward moments between countries come from a few predictable places:
- Sarcasm and irony. They rarely survive translation or a second language. Say what you mean; let the humour come from the situation.
- How direct people are. A short answer can be polite in one place and cold in another. Give it a moment before deciding someone is not interested.
- Personal questions. Age, money, relationships, family — what counts as small talk varies a lot. If you are not sure, ask a lighter question first.
- Gestures. A thumbs-up or an OK sign does not mean the same thing everywhere. On camera, a smile is the safest gesture there is.
When something does land wrong, the fix is simple: "Sorry, that came out wrong — I meant…" Most people are generous with someone who is clearly trying.
How much to share with someone far away
Your country and your city are fine to share; they are half the conversation. Your surname, address, workplace and other accounts can wait until you actually know someone, however far away they are.
Distance is not a safety net. Anyone who pushes you to move to another app straight away, or asks for money for a ticket, a visa, a phone bill or anything else, is a reason to end the call. The community guidelines apply wherever the other person is, and you can block or report anyone.
Talking to someone from another country on Chat Random
A random match can connect you with someone anywhere — that is the point. If you would rather choose, the online list is split by language and each card shows the person's country, so you can call someone from a particular place or someone who speaks your language.
Calls are one-to-one, on camera, and everyone on Chat Random must be at least 18. You can tap Next whenever a conversation is not happening, and stay as long as you like when it is.
Related: Chat with random girls · How Chat Random works